Just a little late for the Holiday Season, but not too late for the Post-Holiday Leftovers Season (which I hereby declare is the entire month of January), here is another edition of my continuing occasional series of things that trigger my sense of the absurd.
Get This Stuff Out Of My Store
Walking into Harris Teeter the day after Christmas, shoppers had to dodge around the many shopping carts full of Christmas leftovers “at least 50% off!” I don’t remember seeing quite so much forlorn merch in previous years. Among the chocolate and candy canes (many many candy canes, some in bizarre flavors), a few anomalies could be seen. A Barbie Monopoly game! Another movie tie-in! An inflatable garden gnome in a Santa hat. And in the spirit of ecumenism, a lone dreidel full of jelly beans, almost submerged in the Christmas-themed calories.
Ah! My Penguin!
During one of my favorite activities, browsing the offerings at a church bazaar, I noticed a collection of salt and pepper shakers among the knick-knacks. There among them appeared a candidate for augmenting my small but choice collection of penguins:
As I picked it up, it occurred to me to wonder why there was a piece of masking tape on its head. The answer came immediately – it was there to keep body and head together.
You have to admire the efficiency of the design while shuddering at the gruesomeness of seasoning your food with penguin body parts.
And in that spirit I give you:
The Nightmare After Christmas
Still there on January 9, down the road from me, 12-foot-tall Jack Skellington. Dressing your giant Hallowe’en skeleton as Santa Claus is so last year! The bulbs light up at night, of course they do.
